This might sound pitiful and “woe-is-me-ish,” but it is true…over the five and approaching six years we have been married my hubby has heard me lament on numerous occasions that “I don’t have any friends.”
He would patiently try to point out the different people in my life, but I would have one reason or another why I couldn’t call them up to hang out or to talk…many, if not most, of them based on my own insecurities.
Hubby never has struggled with a lack of friends or shyness around friends or awkwardness around developing deeper friendships. He sees people, he likes people, he has friends. He has always had a bunch of guys he could call up to go do something with at a moments notice.
Not me. I think a lot of it stems from me not wanting to feel like I am imposing on others or thinking that people don’t actually like me (please note…I am not looking for any type of attention surrounding that statement…it simply is what it is…what my past thought process was). This has been a hard area for me over the years…and I really have struggled through them with a lack of close girlfriends…and have pushed away some who have tried to get closer over my own fears.
But God is faithful.
Are you sensing a theme over the past few posts?
The past, oh…year or two, God has brought many wonderful women into my life and couples into the lives of hubby and I. Some of them I knew before, but have developed deeper relationships with over the past year or two…some of them are new friends. I feel like I am in a very rich season in life with women I can connect with on a deeper level and that I LOVE spending time with. We have some amazing couples that we call friends that we find great joy in hanging out with.
I am thankful.
Thankful for the married ministry at church that was probably the catalyst for a lot of these relationships.
Thankful for the book club I have with a few other amazing women where we can share deeply and honestly.
Thankful for the small group at church we have.
Thankful for the occasional game night with the people from our small group.
Thankful for the mom 2 mom ministry at church – such a HUGE blessing. (Thankful for my son…he seems to help in this area 😉
Thankful for the women outside of those circles who let me “impose” on them and allow me the gift of their friendship…even if some of us don’t connect as often as we’d like.
Thankful for this season of life.